Friday, 15 September 2017

22 Things not to say to new parents

We've mere weeks to go until our little one arrives and I've been thinking a lot about the last nine months. I've had a relatively easy pregnancy but the one thing that always kept coming up was the way people would constantly try and install fear inside you just before you're having a baby because they've been there, done that. They try and pass it off as advice but really, it's unsolicited advice no one wants to hear, the same advice they moaned about when they were pregnant. So here is a list of twenty things not to say to parents to be, all of which have been said during my pregnancy...

  • Congratulations on your pregnancy, now let me tell you all about my horrendous experience that will no doubt terrify you.
  • Oh you can kiss goodbye to those date nights for the foreseeable future! 
  • Sleep? You won't know what that is again for at least ten years. Thanks Brenda.
  • *Spills something on top* You better get used to mess, you'll be covered in everything soon. Having a child doesn't mean we can't be clean.
  • Your life will be just baby now, goodbye identity. 
  • Was it planned? Absolutely none of your business.
  • Have you got stretchmarks yet?  Also, none of your business.
  • Will you be breastfeeding? Still none of your business.
  • Having formula ready in the house is setting yourself up to fail. F*** off.
  • Don't use talcum powder, you'll suffocate your baby. 
  • You'll want all the drugs they will throw at you during labour. That may be true but until I'm there I don't know.
  • Are you going to have more children? No one likes an only child! Can I get this one out first?
  • Omg why are you buying your baby clothes there? It's so expensive. *Eye roll emoji*
  • I hope that's decaf coffee you're drinking?
  • Should you really be eating that while you're pregnant?
  • Are you going to get married before the baby arrives? *Yawn*
  • *Insert nursery/baby item* will be such a waste of money. *Super eye roll emoji*
  • Have you thought about child care yet? Can I have the baby first?
  • Ooo you look like you're about to pop! Thanks full aware I'm a ticking bomb. 
  • Oh that name? Really?
  • Don't use *insert baby skincare brand here* because it once caused a baby to explode.
  • Don't use *insert nappy brand here* because it once caused a baby to explode. 

What comments have you had during your pregnancy?



  1. Totally agree with all of these! It's so so frustrating when people feel the need to tell you what to use & ask all the intrusive questions!!!

  2. I don't understand why people ask such personal questions when it's nothing to do with them? Especially when they are complete strangers it baffles me!! Also that baby grow is gorgeous!!


  3. yes. yes. yes. I'm currently 26 weeks... these questions have been asked THOUSANDS of times since we first announced our pregnancy. I'm absolutely sick of it. I hope someone gives me a firm slap in the face if I do it to them after my baby arrives. No one wants to hear your shit 'advice' Karen.
    Much love, Caitylis x x

  4. Oh my god these are all so true! I get so fed up of the comments. I'm a massive football fan, and have been going since I was 6, my favourite was when one of my friends said. You won't be bothered about going once you've had the baby, football won't matter to you at all! I didn't know what to say, I get it won't be more important than my baby but seriously never go again once I'm a Mum! What!!!

    I think as mums we just have to get used to the "advice" or slap them in the face!

    Rachel xxx

  5. Omg,yes to all of these!I think it's so rude when people ask if your baby was planned.Even worse when you say yes and then they start questioning you why you thought "now" was a good time...Hope you have no problem in telling brenda where to go!I sure didn't!X

  6. There are the weirdest "milestones" in life when people feel like suddenly they can be ridiculously intrusive or rude. I hate when people constantly ask why I haven't gotten pregnant yet after being married for a little while. (Umm -- there's a million reasons why but none of them are your business?) xx

  7. God I couldn't agree more with all of these! Some people are so damn nosy!


  8. Loved reading this!! So true! I find it really strange being asked if the baby was planned. Like, that's pretty personal!

  9. Haha I had a load of these!! I don't get why people feel that because they see a pregnant woman they can ask her a shit load of personal questions and tell them how to live their life! I got sick of people asking me if I was sure I wasn't having twins... very sure, thanks Susan...


  10. These made me laugh so much! The amount of time I had people invade my space as well really annoyed me. Being pregnant doesn't give people the right to randomly touch my stomach! I think the unwarranted advice actually gets worse when the baby arrives.

  11. I've had so many of these! I just don't get it. Lots of "take the drugs" and "your life will never be the same again". Also had a "that's what you're calling her?". Its strange how people want to impose their negative comments / experiences but luckily I've had loads of positivity too, so just trying to ignore the annoying ones. So exciting you've only got weeks to go, I hope the next couple of weeks are kind to you and you're with your little one soon! I have 8 and a bit weeks and time seems to have stopped.

    Amy -


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